Let’s go on the offensive. Due to the feelings of heightened insecurity we’re all trying to process during this pandemic, it’s imperative that we: *Protect our own personal integrity, character, morality *Protect our marriage Risk level: Please hear us when we caution that we’re always at risk: it’s a matter of how high that risk might be. And right …
WARNING: DANGER AHEAD! (Ninja Classes Recommended) Part Three
Craig was an executive pastor at a church when a woman requested an appointment in his office for pastoral counseling. She was vague about the specifics, so Craig—sensing something was a bit off—asked his administrative assistant to be close by and ready. Just in case. When she arrived, he welcomed her warmly and offered her a seat facing him. A …
Insecurity Revelation: What’s Your Default Button?
COVID has altered our culture and society in unprecedented and unsettling ways that we never could have envisioned before March 11, 2020. In light of all that change from “old normal” to “present normal” and what we imagine to be the “new normal,” Craig and I believe there’s great value in taking a realistic look at how it’s affecting each …
Hang in There!
What We’re Learning from the Pandemic Feeling weary? Worn out? Frustrated? Just plain $@**%!!?? We are too. This is our attempt to encourage and say, We care about you; we’re here to help. That subtitle sounds like the proverbial “What I Did for My Summer Vacation” composition. But we hope this really is helpful rather than stale and redundant. And it’s short. …
Survivor Protocol: The Manual
Amendments A, B, C Threat Level: HIGHEST URGENCY Back on October of 2018, we wrote a newsletter introducing you to The Manual. If you missed that edition or if you’ve forgotten The Manual’s significance, you might want to go to my website and skim that again. Just click on the Read More button below. We…er, maybe actually I sensed that Craig’s first interaction with The …
Extra Edition! Emergency Shelter-in-Home Guidelines
AKA: How to Keep from Murdering Each Other in Quarantine happier times! I know you weren’t supposed to get another newsletter until Thursday, April 2. But these are strange times, and emergency measures are called for. I promise this will be the incredibly rare “extra edition” for these unprecedented times. Craig and I want to help however we can. So how …
FOR THESE INSECURE TIMES: Finding Support and Strength in Your Relationship
We had another newsletter 99.9% ready to go. And then COVID-19 happened. Postpone those original plans; begin again with what’s pertinent. And of course I (unintentionally) provided the perfect segue… Friday I started feeling NASTY. Maybe in light of current headlines, you assumed I meant physically nasty, right? And that I was going to add headache, scratchy throat, all-over achy flu? Nope, none …
Our Problem and How We Solved It, We Didn’t Function as a Team, Part 1: Now, I Understand
When Craig and I shared the 3-part series on our broken sex life (mid-February – March newsletters), we candidly admitted that was one of the two times our marriage hit its lowest points. The other precarious period occurred when we were thoroughly invested in our first full-time ministry. Craig was a popular youth pastor; I was intent on being a …
Our Problem and How We Solved It, We Didn’t Function as a Team, Part 2: Now, I Understand
Years ago when Craig was a pastor, I remember a situation that was profoundly enlightening for me. We would soon be going on a pastors/wives retreat (there were over 20 pastors on staff), and I was in charge of an activity for the wives. I loved those women, and I wanted to do a great job for them, so I …
Our Problem and How We Solved It, We Didn’t Function as a Team, Part 3: Now, I Understand
First, an honest evaluation: Which of you is more hesitant to look at his/her emotions? And therefore….also more reluctant to look at his/her partner’s feelings? Before we go any deeper, Craig and I ask that you take this first step of faith to assess – not to assign blame or weakness or inadequacy. Instead, this is merely an identification step …