COVID – Weird Consequences from Its Merciless Stress, Part Two: Fuel for My Weaknesses
Weird things happen to us physically, emotionally, and intellectually when we’re subject to merciless stress. Which means like now. Because the “We’re NEVER going to get past this horrific, brutal pandemic” feeling does not bring out the best in us. On the contrary, you can count on just about every negative in your life showing up somewhere. Somehow. Eventually!
This newsletter, we’re looking at control issues. Once again, our fears (especially fears that are unspoken or repressed) packaged in this hothouse of relentless stress fuel weaknesses and obsessions—personal issues that we normally control pretty well. In tension-filled times like this pandemic, however, those areas become accentuated. They’re more demanding, more insistent, more dominant. In other words, they can quickly move to being out of control.
In a nutshell, here’s the problem: Merciless stress and fear subconsciously control actions that in normal times I would manage/govern better.
Relate to any of these weaknesses or obsessions?
Eating more
“I cannot stare at a computer screen for one more second. Taking a break. In the kitchen, by the pantry. Where are the Kettle Chips anyway?”
Excessive shopping/buying
“I’ll just browse a bit…BUY TWO GET ONE FREE? Can’t pass that up. Maybe I should buy four and get two free?”
Loss of blocks of time while playing digital games/interacting with social media
“Just give me one more minute. I can’t go AFK right now. Working on the best K/D ratio I’ve ever had!”
Exercising obsessively
“Gotta run 5 miles, lift weights, and ride my bike for 50 miles. Today. How else am I gonna work off those chips?”
Fixation to the point of control by an addiction/weakness/etc.
“I’ve had no problem with my alcohol consumption for years. Why am I craving that additional glass of wine now?”
Your weaknesses may be far different than the few listed above. Personalize your own issues…and then commit to a plan to regain some of that lost control. During this stressful time, you may not win 100% victory. But you can make progress.
Ask God to give you insight and strength
Consider writing out your prayer in a journal. Be specific.
Admit and own your weakness/obsession/addiction
Don’t waste time on blame, shame, or guilt; instead, use your feelings as a positive springboard to ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?”
Discover your unique “steps” that lead to a lack of control
For example: If you have empty time while waiting for an appointment, don’t default to playing a game on your phone. Be prepared. Next time you know you’ll be waiting somewhere, bring along a good book or puzzles (word teasers, crossword puzzles, sudoku, etc.)
Find a passage of Scripture that you can repeat to serve as a reminder
Select a passage as short (or long) as you like and can memorize fairly easily. Write it out on 5×7 cards and post those in several places in your home, car, desk. If you commit to reading/repeating that passage several times a day, eventually you will put it to memory.
Ask your spouse for help
You’re in this together! Read Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.
Write out a “plan of attack”
Discuss strategies to be accountable to each other.
Please seek professional help, if needed
Don’t wait until your need becomes urgent. There’s no weakness or sin in seeking help when you need it, and especially in the areas of serious addiction. Get help now.
Bullet Points:
Unrelenting stress coupled with fear can mean a normally controlledweakness shifts to the weakness to controllingme.
I need to recognize and own these weaknesses.
I should commit to a plan of attack.
Being accountable to each other can provide help.
Following spiritual disciplines also provides assistance: Take time to read Scripture, pray, memorize, reflect.
Being quarantined in the house for weeks can also lead to some weird exchanges between the two of you….
A wife yelled from upstairs, asking, “Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body? Like someone’s got a voodoo doll of you and they’re stabbing it?”
Sounding concerned, the husband replied, “No….”
She responded, “How about now?”
