1.3.2019 So a conversation I overheard in the locker room this morning sounded all too familiar, and it went something like this: “Get your Christmas decorations put away?” “No, not yet. Not looking forward to that, either. It’s so much work!” “Is [insert your husband’s name here] able to help?” “Well…yes and no. You know how that goes.” Chuckles …
Just Questions
Just Questions 12.20.2018 Many have asked us, “How do you get so much out of a vacation time away?” Or we hear, “Why do you enjoy long car trips so much?” Simple answer: Because for years we’ve had a pro-active approach to our marriage and the opportunities that times like that offer. Specifically *We can ignore the possibilities, allowing each …
The Flip Side
12.6.2018 A type of “he said/she said,” but definitely about what one spouse intended to communicate….versus what the other heard. He said: “Let’s leave for the ___ at 6 pm.” He meant: We’ll be in the car and ready to pull out of the garage by 5:55 pm. That way we’re actually leaving at 6 pm. She heard: …
Forgiveness in Marriage: What’s Your Default Line?
11.15.2018 “You’re holding a grudge. For your sake, you need to forgive me.” “You need to just let that go.” “I’m sorry.” “Forgive me.” “Please forgive me.” “I’m sorry. Forgiven?” “I’m so sorry I hurt you. Will you please forgive me?” Seven possibilities. Which one would you choose as the “right” one when you’ve wounded your partner? What’s your “default” …
When You’re This Ticked
11.1.2018 It’s probably a blessing that I rarely recall the specifics of what Craig and I’ve argued about at any given time, but I’m definitely cursed with remembering the feelings. Plus a few images—snapshots that pop up in my mind’s eye. Rarely am I able to call up an entire argument: the details, what was said, the ability to picture …
The Manual
10.9.2018 We were exhausted from a long day. Both of us had just crawled into bed (my side toasty warm from the “woobie”—a heating blanket—I’d turned up to high) when Craig reached out to switch off the bedside lamp. “Oh drat. We left the light on in the hallway,” Craig said. Sighs from both of us. “So who’s going to …
Creating Pathways
We’re excited to share this new name for our ministry to couples! We wrestled over a name for much of the way from Happy Valley, Oregon, to the Rocky Mountains and back (that’s a total of over 2,000 miles!), throwing ideas back and forth until I was convinced we’d never come up with a name that…fit us. But once …